Certified Crank Phonograph Expert..... Seriously????

[maginter]

I was looking though the various Forums today and stumbled across this. So what is required to become a Certified Crank Phonograph Expert????? Is there training for this?????

[52089]

I was looking though the various Forums today and stumbled across this. So what is required to become a Certified Crank Phonograph Expert????? Is there training for this?????

Yes, but it's mostly self-taught. In order to qualify as a CCPE, you must meet all the following criteria:

1) You must have once - and only once - attempted to remove springs from a phonograph before they were fully wound down. Bonus points if you have a facial scar to prove it.

2) You must have an opinion on what an "off brand" is, and it must be different than every other opinion on the subject.

3) You must have lost count of the number of small screws, ball bearings, etc. you have lost.

4) You must have broken at least one completely irreplaceable record, preferably through no fault of your own (e.g. putting a wax Amberol on a mandrel)

I'm sure there are more. Keep it going!

[fran604g]

I'm an expert certified crank. Is that the same thing?

-Fran

[phonogfp]

[maginter]

I was looking though the various Forums today and stumbled across this. So what is required to become a Certified Crank Phonograph Expert????? Is there training for this?????

Yes, but it's mostly self-taught. In order to qualify as a CCPE, you must meet all the following criteria:

1) You must have once - and only once - attempted to remove springs from a phonograph before they were fully wound down. Bonus points if you have a facial scar to prove it.

2) You must have an opinion on what an "off brand" is, and it must be different than every other opinion on the subject.

3) You must have lost count of the number of small screws, ball bearings, etc. you have lost.

4) You must have broken at least one completely irreplaceable record, preferably through no fault of your own (e.g. putting a wax Amberol on a mandrel)

I'm sure there are more. Keep it going!

WOW, I will never be a CCPE....

1) I remove them all the time and have never hurt myself.
2) Nope, missed this one.
3) I struggle to see them, I'm old, but seldom loose them.
4) Now this one, I might be close on. Coon Sanders, Harlem Madness. Slid off the lid when I opened the machine. I wouldn't sat it was irreplaceable, but I hav not been able to find another copy in almost 10 years.

[maginter]

I'm an expert certified crank. Is that the same thing?

-Fran

Naaa, I really don't think so....

[maginter]

Now I think that George is getting really close....

[Django]

I’ve been told that I am certifiable, does that count?

[maginter]

I’ve been told that I am certifiable, does that count?

I think that we are all at that point.

[AllWoundUp]

I think they left out a comma, should be:

"Certified Crank, Phonograph Expert"