'Worst Phonograph Description On Craigslist' contest

[Tinkerbell]

It's "eclectic" all right -- two phonographs in one, apparently! "Uncirculated"? "Prototype . . . . needle head"? "Fruit dye"? Per Sonny's post above:

Screen Shot 2012-08-29 at 7.29.41 AM.png

Not to mention the fact that Craigslist must be experiencing major software glitches if they are randomly sending out auction notices, and transforming their classifieds into an auction website!

Then again, this does seem to be a very special and unique "transformer" of a phonograph!

[HisMastersVoice]

I should buy that Standard Talking Machine, I'm having a hard time getting cylinders to play on my Victor III

[JohnM]

[estott]

Screen Shot 2012-09-15 at 12.00.35 AM.png

That's ridiculous, but I'd still like to see it. Those linear tracking turntables aren't common at all.

[JohnM]

Another winner!

[FloridaClay]

Clay

[GoCOOGS!]

Another winner!

Geez.. No grammar whats-so-ever. It amazes me that English is actually some of these people's FIRST language. Apparently that phonograph is made by three different makers. lol.

[Cody K]

I've been resisting the charms of this one on the local CL for some months now. There's no picture anyway, so the text says it all:

1920 Victor Victrola - $200 (Warwick)

First Off, I'm not answering any Emails asking to respond with Non CL email address
The Phone # is in the Ad for a reason
CALL THE # OR DON'T BOTHER ME
Worked Last Time I cranked it up like 20 years ago Spare needles and records THANX
[Phone number removed.]

So inviting!

AND DON'T ASK ME TO CRANK IT UP
I have a machete

Okay, I made that last part up.

[FloridaClay]

I've been resisting the charms of this one on the local CL for some months now. There's no picture anyway, so the text says it all:

1920 Victor Victrola - $200 (Warwick)

First Off, I'm not answering any Emails asking to respond with Non CL email address
The Phone # is in the Ad for a reason
CALL THE # OR DON'T BOTHER ME
Worked Last Time I cranked it up like 20 years ago Spare needles and records THANX
[Phone number removed.]

So inviting!

AND DON'T ASK ME TO CRANK IT UP
I have a machete

Okay, I made that last part up.

Apparently attended the Attila the Hun school of salesmanship!

Clay

[Player-Tone]

I've been resisting the charms of this one on the local CL for some months now. There's no picture anyway, so the text says it all:

1920 Victor Victrola - $200 (Warwick)

First Off, I'm not answering any Emails asking to respond with Non CL email address
The Phone # is in the Ad for a reason
CALL THE # OR DON'T BOTHER ME
Worked Last Time I cranked it up like 20 years ago Spare needles and records THANX
[Phone number removed.]

So inviting!

AND DON'T ASK ME TO CRANK IT UP
I have a machete

Okay, I made that last part up.

It's probably something really nice too, like a VTLA or XVIII. I guess we will never know- it was too much work for him to put up a picture or at least say what the darn thing is (unless all "1920 Victor Victrolas" are the same)!