A Humble Confession, and a Warning to Fellow Noobs

[winsleydale]

I have something terrible to admit to all: A small while ago, on an impulse, I bought... a Crapophone. "How bad could it be?" I thought. "It works just the same." No, it doesn't! They are crap, and I learned the hard way! The only positive at all is the fact that the seller was able to file a claim with the UPS over some damage and get my money back, so I have a free... thing... to experiment with. Please, fellow noobs, take the advice of the other people on the forum, AVOID reproductions. Consider this: The thing sounded better (still terrible, but better) after replacing the stock diaphragm... with part of a PAPER PLATE. They are sooo not worth the money.

[dutchman]

It is disturbing to ponder the fact that in 80 years these things will be collectible. I can see the Ebay listing now -- I don't know anything about these machines but I've been told this is a very rare, early reproduction, circa 1995,comes with a super rare 78 RPM record. This is not one of those machines put together with Victor/Columbia/Brunswick parts etc etc etc, but built with genuine Indian and Indonesian reproduction parts.....

[phonoman1998]

It is disturbing to ponder the fact that in 80 years these things will be collectible. I can see the Ebay listing now -- I don't know anything about these machines but I've been told this is a very rare, early reproduction, circa 1995,comes with a super rare 78 RPM record. This is not one of those machines put together with Victor/Columbia/Brunswick parts etc etc etc, but built with genuine Indian and Indonesian reproduction parts.....

Today is a sad, sad day...

[gramophone78]

We have a ton of threads pertaining to "crapophones & frankenphones" on our forum. You may want to check the history through our search section.

This should help provide anyone contemplating the purchase of such machine's with invaluable information....

[dutchman]

On the other hand I was 17 when the 57 Chevy came out, could not afford one then and I cannot afford one today (well not really,) it is sort of like trying to collect early external horned Victors and Columbia machines today. Sadly these reproductions may be the only machines available and within reach in the distant distant future. :lol Cheers

Bill K

[Jerry B.]

I really hate the fakes because I want new collectors to have a positive experience in the hobby. I want antique dealers to have a profitable experience stocking and selling phono related items and not get burned by fakes. When I set up at a sale as a dealer, I want to be proud of the things on my table. It always pleases me when someone comes up to me and tells me how pleased they were with a prior purchase. I will never be part of a fraudulent sale. People will make the true statement that crapophones are part of phono history but they'll never be part of my history. Jerry Blais

[epigramophone]

I have something terrible to admit to all: A small while ago, on an impulse, I bought... a Crapophone. "How bad could it be?" I thought. "It works just the same." No, it doesn't! They are crap, and I learned the hard way! The only positive at all is the fact that the seller was able to file a claim with the UPS over some damage and get my money back, so I have a free... thing... to experiment with. Please, fellow noobs, take the advice of the other people on the forum, AVOID reproductions. Consider this: The thing sounded better (still terrible, but better) after replacing the stock diaphragm... with part of a PAPER PLATE. They are sooo not worth the money.

If you avoid the big names such as Victor/HMV and Columbia, there are plenty of genuine external horn machines out there for sensible money. Many are of German/Swiss origin and the better examples with double spring motors, gooseneck tonearms and large horns offer excellent sound quality.

If at all possible, view and listen before you buy. There is no better way of acquiring experience than attending auctions and fairs. I started collecting decades before the existence of the internet, and still treat it as a dangerous novelty.

[Player-Tone]

It is disturbing to ponder the fact that in 80 years these things will be collectible. I can see the Ebay listing now -- I don't know anything about these machines but I've been told this is a very rare, early reproduction, circa 1995,comes with a super rare 78 RPM record. This is not one of those machines put together with Victor/Columbia/Brunswick parts etc etc etc, but built with genuine Indian and Indonesian reproduction parts.....

In 80 years they probably won't be around to be collected anyway, their future resides in the landfill! Rubbish they are and rubbish they shall return.

[Chuck]

How bad could it be?

You now have the answer to that question.

Chuck