'Worst Phonograph Description On Craigslist' contest

[JohnM]

Is it being crushed in one of those James Bond rooms where the walls close in? PS: Attention OrthoSean -- a ton of records comes with it!

http://bham.craigslist.org/fuo/1766504606.html

VICTROLA - $450 (Cahaba Heights)

This piece is very stunning. I don't think I have ever seen a nicer one. Guess what a ton of records comes with it and the needles! Just grab a brandy or beer and listen to Caruso.
Call 205-936-6905 for my melodic details.

[SignatureSeriesOwner]

Is it just me, or do those knobs look overly large?

[bbphonoguy]

You're right SSO, the knobs look like replacements. The description is right on, it's "stunning"; it's way overpriced and I'm stunned.

[antique1973]

If the owner put ghetto knobs on it like that, I would wonder what else has
been tinkered with. It probably has a cheap Franken-motor from
India.

[SignatureSeriesOwner]

I'm pretty sure I have those same knobs on my bathroom cabinetry.

[JohnM]

Spelle/grammare checke, please! Ite hurt's toe looeke ate ite!

http://lacrosse.craigslist.org/atq/1694376143.html

"Orthophonic Victrola Radiola (West Salem Wi)

Victrola Radio, Record Player, Loud Speacker. Very Rare. It is a No. 7-3 made in 1926. It comes with all origenal books and paper work includeing wireing diagram for the battery. I also have the origenal battery though it does not hold a charge anymore. This is not a 50.00 dallar piece. Though I'am willing to sell for less than valued on Victrola's web site. Call me @ 608-769-3421"

[JohnM]

Never seen this wood species before, or a Brunswick Victrola for that matter. Strange the seller should do this, he seems to grasp the whole Ultona concept.

http://chambersburg.craigslist.org/atq/1778400618.html

"NICE MAHONY VICTROLA - $150 (FROSTBURG, MD)

Here is a nice Brunswick windup phonograph model 110 in mahony finish. It is in good shape with one small chip to the right of the grill. All hardware is in great shape and the phonograph is equiped with the more expensive and better sounding Ultona reproducer capable of playing both regular 78RPM records as well as Edison diamond disks. The phonograph plays great and has no problems. I am asking $150.00 cash. I am willing to deliver a short distance to help out. E-mail with any questions. Thanks for looking."

[antique1973]

Spelle/grammare checke, please! Ite hurt's toe looeke ate ite!

http://lacrosse.craigslist.org/atq/1694376143.html

"Orthophonic Victrola Radiola (West Salem Wi)

Victrola Radio, Record Player, Loud Speacker. Very Rare. It is a No. 7-3 made in 1926. It comes with all origenal books and paper work includeing wireing diagram for the battery. I also have the origenal battery though it does not hold a charge anymore. This is not a 50.00 dallar piece. Though I'am willing to sell for less than valued on Victrola's web site. Call me @ 608-769-3421"

Ok ok, I will give you 51 DALLARS!

[JohnM]

Please use your windfall to go back to school.

http://denver.craigslist.org/atq/1778031058.html

"1929 brunswick cabnit photogragh - $5000 (northglenn,co)

WORKING WITH EDISON RECORDS, SOME CABNIT WORK. IF INTRESTED PLEASE CALL 720-839-1348. 303-931-8474 LEAVE MESSAGE. WILLING TO MAKE OFFER."

[Nat]

At least this one, from the Seattle craigslist, is honest:

"Antique Victrola for sale. Don't know much about it, but do know it is OLD."

No pics, no model number...